Well, here we go...I'm finally starting the birth story, but before I talk about going into labor, I need to tell you how I prepared for labor, so you can appreciate the labor and delivery story. DH and I took a 6-week lamaze class offered by the hospital we were going to deliver at. We actually took a whole series of classes that included parenting, infant safety, lamaze, breastfeeding, etc. It was a package deal, so we got a discount on the pricing:-) For 6 weeks we learned about the stages of labor, relaxation techniques and comfort measures, breathing techniques (hee hee, ha ha), and medical interventions. We also watched a birth video and talked briefly about what to do after Baby arrived. Oh, and DH got to wear the empathy belly (a 30 pound outfit with breasts, a pregnant belly, and simulated rib pain). That was my favorite part. I got pictures of him wearing it, but I'll spare him the blog embarrassment.
This being our first experience with labor, I'd say the classes were informative and helpful. We learned a lot about labor and this particular hospital's general approaches to it. Therefore, it gave DH and I a lot to talk about as far as our preferences for our birth at the hospital, and we were able to start some of the relaxation techniques during the end of the pregnancy.
With that said, however, once the class was over, I did not feel prepared to give birth. I don't know if it was because I still had a lot of fear about the pain or if there were so many things in the class I felt like I couldn't remember how to do them all.
Even as we were preparing to take lamaze, I knew I wanted to have a doula (labor coach) present for our birth. I knew I would need someone to keep me calm, and I also knew it couldn't be DH because I probably wouldn't listen solely to him since neither of us had been through the birth process before. We found a Christian lady we really liked who had been present at over 60 births. She'd been a doula for almost 15 years and actually used to teach the Bradley Method. We arranged to go through her comfort measures class after we finished lamaze, so that's what we did. We learned all the basics from the hospital-sponsored class and then worked with the doula specifically on her approach to labor. She focused more on a deep, slow breathing technique that I liked better than the lamaze one, and she also had a lot of different positions to labor in that we practiced. We practiced some self-pep-talks as I called them (I'm a strong confident woman. Labor is a natural process, etc.) I also coined my own phrases that I wanted to focus on during labor that were meaningful to me, yet short enough that I could remember them (I thought).
They were: Trust God. Trust my body
and God is good. This (labor) is good.
These were phrases that helped me focus on God, first of all. I knew I would need Him to be clearly present during labor to give me peace and comfort during what might be the most difficult thing I'd have to get through thus far. And the phrases also started teaching me to trust my body/trust the labor process. Trusting my body was not something I was able to do well...even through pregnancy I still thought my body was going to fail me, since my experience with my body was so many years of failure and brokenness. I knew I needed to start re-training my mind in regards to my thoughts about my body in order to make it through labor.
After the comfort measures classes with the doula, we started working on writing our birth plan. This was a one-page document where DH and I recorded our preferences, to the best of our ability, regarding our hoped for birth outcome. It was actually harder to write than I thought because I knew what some of the hospital procedures were (cutting the cord right away) and knew what my preference would be (waiting to cut the cord until it's stopped pulsing). Some of the things I decided weren't as big of a deal to me as others like the timeline for cutting the cord. Here's what we came up with:
This being our first experience with labor, I'd say the classes were informative and helpful. We learned a lot about labor and this particular hospital's general approaches to it. Therefore, it gave DH and I a lot to talk about as far as our preferences for our birth at the hospital, and we were able to start some of the relaxation techniques during the end of the pregnancy.
With that said, however, once the class was over, I did not feel prepared to give birth. I don't know if it was because I still had a lot of fear about the pain or if there were so many things in the class I felt like I couldn't remember how to do them all.
Even as we were preparing to take lamaze, I knew I wanted to have a doula (labor coach) present for our birth. I knew I would need someone to keep me calm, and I also knew it couldn't be DH because I probably wouldn't listen solely to him since neither of us had been through the birth process before. We found a Christian lady we really liked who had been present at over 60 births. She'd been a doula for almost 15 years and actually used to teach the Bradley Method. We arranged to go through her comfort measures class after we finished lamaze, so that's what we did. We learned all the basics from the hospital-sponsored class and then worked with the doula specifically on her approach to labor. She focused more on a deep, slow breathing technique that I liked better than the lamaze one, and she also had a lot of different positions to labor in that we practiced. We practiced some self-pep-talks as I called them (I'm a strong confident woman. Labor is a natural process, etc.) I also coined my own phrases that I wanted to focus on during labor that were meaningful to me, yet short enough that I could remember them (I thought).
They were: Trust God. Trust my body
and God is good. This (labor) is good.
These were phrases that helped me focus on God, first of all. I knew I would need Him to be clearly present during labor to give me peace and comfort during what might be the most difficult thing I'd have to get through thus far. And the phrases also started teaching me to trust my body/trust the labor process. Trusting my body was not something I was able to do well...even through pregnancy I still thought my body was going to fail me, since my experience with my body was so many years of failure and brokenness. I knew I needed to start re-training my mind in regards to my thoughts about my body in order to make it through labor.
After the comfort measures classes with the doula, we started working on writing our birth plan. This was a one-page document where DH and I recorded our preferences, to the best of our ability, regarding our hoped for birth outcome. It was actually harder to write than I thought because I knew what some of the hospital procedures were (cutting the cord right away) and knew what my preference would be (waiting to cut the cord until it's stopped pulsing). Some of the things I decided weren't as big of a deal to me as others like the timeline for cutting the cord. Here's what we came up with:
Date: April 17, 2012
Our main goal is to have a healthy baby, healthy mom, and positive birth experience. While I know that I may need to respond to unexpected situations, this birth plan reflects our current desires.
· -I would like my labor to begin on its own, unless there's a medical reason why induction would be safer.
· -I would like to labor without pain relief drugs as long as possible using comfort and relaxation measures such as walking, position changes, and trying the Jacuzzi tub.
· - I plan to have continuous labor support from my husband and a doula.
· -I would like my labor room to be as quiet and calm as possible with as few interruptions and vaginal exams as possible.
· -I would like fetal monitoring to be intermittent and external if the baby shows no distress signs.
· -I would prefer to have my waters break on their own.
-I am comfortable with letting labor progress at its own rhythm, and I prefer non-drug methods to
help labor progress.
· -I prefer to let my perineum stretch on its own, and I realize I may experience a natural tear.
· -If absolutely necessary, we would prefer vacuum extraction over forceps.
· -If I’ve not had an epidural, I’d prefer mother-initiated pushing.
· -After delivery, I would like my husband to cut the cord.
· -After baby is suctioned and cleaned, I would like to hold baby skin to skin.
· -I want to breastfeed as soon as possible after delivery. Please delay baby’s eye ointment application until after breastfeeding.
· -I want to keep baby with me after birth, allowing us to have as much skin-to-skin contact as possible and unlimited opportunities for breastfeeding.
· -We would like to be present for baby’s 1st bath and the pediatrician’s exam of baby.
-Please don’t give baby bottles, formula, or pacifiers.
-Please don’t give baby the Hepatitis B vaccine. We are delaying this.
We actually shared this birth plan with our doula first to get her feedback and did make a few changes from what she suggested. Then we shared the plan with our OB. I wasn't sure how she would respond, but she was very open to everything we had written and said it wasn't really that far off from what they usually do at the hospital (skin to skin, breastfeeding right away, etc.) She kept a copy of the birth plan in my medical file and I printed extra copies and added them to our hospital bag.
You notice that I don't have much about pain relief medications in the birth plan. My thought was that I'd like to labor as long as possible without medication, but I didn't think I could go through the whole labor and delivery without any meds because I didn't think I had the mental strength or physical stamina to endure. I thought I'd end up with an epidural at some point. My DH, on the other hand, thought I was mentally tougher than I gave myself credit for, but this was really one area that I was quite uncertain about. It was strange to have labor looming on the horizon, and not really have a "plan" of how exactly it would go. I'm such a planner, this was a first for me, and for the most part, I was ok doing as much preparation as I could, and then just waiting it out to see how things went. Though I'll admit, at times, it was still scary to think about the pains of labor, and even right up until the end, I sort of got freaked out by the whole idea that I actually had to go through the birthing process.
Now that our classes were completed, our meetings had been completed with our doula, and our birth plan was in writing...the only thing left to do was wait until labor started.
To be continued in Part 2...
You notice that I don't have much about pain relief medications in the birth plan. My thought was that I'd like to labor as long as possible without medication, but I didn't think I could go through the whole labor and delivery without any meds because I didn't think I had the mental strength or physical stamina to endure. I thought I'd end up with an epidural at some point. My DH, on the other hand, thought I was mentally tougher than I gave myself credit for, but this was really one area that I was quite uncertain about. It was strange to have labor looming on the horizon, and not really have a "plan" of how exactly it would go. I'm such a planner, this was a first for me, and for the most part, I was ok doing as much preparation as I could, and then just waiting it out to see how things went. Though I'll admit, at times, it was still scary to think about the pains of labor, and even right up until the end, I sort of got freaked out by the whole idea that I actually had to go through the birthing process.
