Help is on the Way!

Yes, you read that correctly...help is coming my way.  After 9 days....9 long, full days of being a single parent to my little 7 week old, the end is in sight.  DH's aunt and cousin are still coming, and they arrive tonight.  TONIGHT!  As in a few more hours.  The funeral for his great-uncle was Monday morning and they left yesterday afternoon to make the drive out.

I'm so excited.  I didn't really think they would be coming so soon; I had geared up to be alone until Friday night.  I can't wait to see them and have two extra adults in the house to hold the baby and cook food.  Like real food!  No more leftovers or freezer meals for me.  And people to talk with and respond to me using words.

I know I could have lasted until DH comes home, but it is so nice not to have to.  I'm looking forward to introducing R. to them, to getting a nap in during the daytime where I'm not laying on the couch next to her swing and listening to all her baby sounds while she sleeps, and I hope to make it back to the gym this week since my membership came off of medical hold and I'm paying for it again.

But I'll be honest...I'm actually a little bit sad.  Crazy, I know.  But it will no longer be just the two of us. R and I have had some amazing bonding time these past several days.  I can honestly say that I am happy I had to go through so many days with her alone.  Yes, it was extremely hard and there were times I would cry because I was so tired, but I feel like such a better mother to her because of it.  I sort of think of it like being thrown into the "fire of parenting."  I didn't want to be thrown into the fire, but am so much stronger having come out of that fire.

Before DH left, I was really relying on him as the main parent because he had so much more experience with newborns than my zero experience with them.  I let him help out a lot with feedings, burping, diaper changes, etc.  And this was all fine and dandy for those first few weeks, but I began relying too much on him, so that his work was suffering some because he didn't want to leave me alone with her too long.  Granted, I was sick myself and recovering some in there, but still, I was lacking as R's mother.

The first 24 hours alone with her were hard.  She probably detected that her Daddy was gone and her Mommy was stressed, but then I started following my motherly instincts, and without even knowing it, developed a routine with her that kept her content and virtually cry-free the entire time!  I only realize it now looking back.  Her periods of fussiness and intense crying are almost gone.  Whether that's something she's grown out of or can be attributed to my time with her, I don't know for sure, but I suspect it's because of the routine.  She knows when she wakes up and cries I will change her and feed her.  Then we have play time in her bouncy seat.  Sometimes I play with her and sometimes she plays alone for a bit.  When I see she's getting tired (yawns, staring off into the distance), I start working to get her asleep.  And it works!  Most of the time she falls asleep without fussing.  I've learned to read her cues.  Even I'm a little amazed/surprised at that.

And we've had fun times together too.  She's started making different cooing sounds and even two syllable sounds.  She smiles regularly at me now and even started laughing this past week.  She's even laughed in her sleep on a few occasions, which is hilarious.  She's helpful when I'm changing her diaper by not squirming much and even keeping her legs raised so I can clean her bottom (that cracks me up).  She slept for 5 1/2 hours the past two nights.  She regularly takes one long (3ish hours) nap in the morning and/or afternoon.  She has become such a good-natured baby, and I have fallen in love with her even more than when she was first born.  All our bonding time together has enabled me to do that, and I'm truly thankful for that time.

I told DH he was going to have to watch out because he was going to have to follow my routine with R when he came home.  He said he was ok with that, but we'll see how she does upon his return.  She did gain about a pound since he was gone, so she's going to look different.  She now has a little pudge on her thighs and arms.  It's so cute!  She's still long and skinny, but the baby fat is coming.

Look at those precious toes.  I just love her feet.  Her toes (and fingers) are so long.  She must get that from her Daddy.

She loves her birds on her Snugabunny swing.  She watches them, talks to them, and still is mesmerized by them.  I love watching her watch them.

Making silly faces at Mommy.

I'd share more pictures with you from this week, but I don't know how to get them off of my new phone at the moment.  Ah, well.  I love that girl.  Sometimes I can't lay down for a nap because I'm just watching her sleep.  She is so stinking cute.

Now off to feed her and try to get a shower in before our company arrives.  Woo hoo!